Yesterday...

I payed $1.99 for sixteen white babies....

.....and $1.99 for three additional white soft babies......

Now that's a total of nineteen white babies for under $4.00.

Housekeeping 101

Feeling Lonely?

Or need a creepy cooing fix? Get it from Target....middle aisle, toy section...

The Waitress's Speech

I was riding my bike down town when I decided to stop and snoop around the internally demolished Macleod's Irish Pub (or used to be). This classy karaoke hot-spot just happened to be my place of employment a little over a decade ago. One of the gazillion restaurants/pub jobs I held during my roaring twenties.

So I go inside, start shuffling around and memories are surfacing. Mostly of a few folks I worked with, two ladies in particular. First, this early forty something hyper-granola girl, not the typical jam band following trustafarian type but closer to the fruit loop type. During break time she'd speak of various activism efforts gone awry and her favorite hippy hobbies consisting mainly of grass smoking, acid dropping, and physically rolling in flower beds (well, guess we had a few things in common). But this girl would tie herself to T-Dot trucks, wander parking lots slapping earth-first stickers on Escalades and camp in trees three days on end. Unfortunately, her efforts landed her in jail, roads were still expanded and trees were still hacked. Gotta give her an "A" for effort at least. The thing I found highly peculiar was how she nonchalantly giggled about these fizzled fiascos as if the causes she so boldly fought for, in reality, held no importance to her whatsoever. 

The next girl coming to mind trained me my first week. Boy was she ever mean! She bitterly bossed the heck out of people and wore her seniority like a neon sign, flicking it on every time we needed something. But here's the kicker, she stuttered....horribly. I watched "The King's Speech" the other night and consistently thought of her throughout the movie. And listen folks, I'd never make light of someone's physical uncontrollables, that's ALL KINDS of wrong. But I won't lie, the idea was definitely entertained. My darker side wanted full on no-holds-barred retaliation! That's right, I wanted her to feel as horrid as I felt in the wake of her extreme bitchiness. And with my twenty two year old piss-poor attitude and unbridled tongue, it's surprising I kept my cool. Looking back, I'm glad I did. Who knows what she'd been through, probably some messed up stuff. You know, it sorta feels bad thinking about it now, wish I'd been kinder. Oh well, you live and you learn right? And I can't beat myself up too much. As time passed, we did actually become friendlier with one another and her stammer lessened (around me at least).....that movie was fabulous by the way.

Welcome to Macleod's! Smoking, non, or landfill section?

      This drink station appears to be out of order.

Bring on the drunk frat daddies!!

"Illogical Affair"

Today's blogtastic plan is to write a quick and short review of a new album I heard this past week. No Pitchfork-esque write-up but merely a simple "how this music speaks to me" note. A week ago, musical artist Joshua Rosen contacted me via lastfm email and asked if I would review his new album on my blog. It was kinda cool. And no, he doesn't know me from Adam but his listener fan base is relatively small and I happened to be the sole commenter on his page, or better yet, the sole shouter in his shout box thus making me a prime target. In this case however, I was happy to be hit. And well, I sorta felt sorry for him....haha.... oh I'm kidding. Seriously, the message in his music is awesome and spreading it around makes me feel good.

"Illogical Affair", released in late April, is Rosen's second record. Keep in mind, I'm only a happy listener and not your typical techy music reviewer/writer so please bare with my simplicity. The album is highly spiritual but not religious, and thankfully it doesn't have that extreme Christian radio sound. I'd name a few bands that fit this bill but I figure that's a fruitless endeavor. And again, these are my personal thoughts, to each his own. The new record's musical style is primarily folk, lots of acoustic guitar, soft vocals and occasional trumpets (which were a lovely addition). However, the appeal of Rosen's music is more personal than instruments and vocals. The author of his lastfm bio states it well, "I'm pretty sure he didn't write all these songs in the woods somewhere. No, the intrigue and richness of this music comes not through fabled lore or even musical prowess, but rather in his person." That is so true! You'll find no spousal rights, late nights or whiskey fights on this record. Mistakenly, I blew through the first listen and didn't fully take it in until I sat down, got quiet, and concentrated on the music/message. I tell ya, it's meaty stuff. A close friend of mine always says "it's like steak!"...and no need for A1 (which I find gross anyway), there's plenty of flavor here...nurh....Corniness aside, the lyrics resonated with me the second time around and I even got a little misty eyed. His songs are filled with restoration, transformation, taking off the old, putting on the new, boldness, unity and simply enjoying God. It reminded me how one touch or simple word is often more life changing than a thousand sermons. You'll also find praise in the mix and honest depictions of struggles we face as flawed humans living in a world of full of fears, distractions, empty pleasures and limitations. If you pay this album proper attention, it'll strike a few heart strings regardless of your beliefs. So get dinner out of the way, feed your dog, put earphones on, quiet your mind and head to the closet...

http://joshuarosen.bandcamp.com/album/illogical-affair

Shark Man

Most neighborhoods have a token crazy person. The fun kind of crazy. At least that's my experience. And please note: I'm not referring to folks that make puppy skin pocket books and hack up bunnies. But a milder level of crazy....perhaps bizarre, eccentric or quirky are better (more PC) descriptives. Their expressions of nuttiness come in different levels and flavors. Extreme excessive lawn art/statues/knick knacks are probably the mildest but most common flavor. You know behind every yard adorned with multiple mirrored balls, gaggles of plastic geese, snow white's seven dwarfs, and mobs of stucco deer lie a crazy person....a crazy awesome person!!

Anyway...yesterday I was delighted to snap pics of this place - yipes!! The home of "Shark Man". He lives a few houses down from a buddy of mine. She said he's into "all things shark"....Understandable. I mean heck, we need sharks up in these Tennessee hills. All we got round here are a buncha' catfish n' crappie! 

I'd love to hear his story, maybe catch him out in his yard one day. Hopefully he'll grant me a tour of his lair.

Better hide your yappy ankle biters (on second thought, don't hide them).....these guys are hungry for blood! 

Shhh, they're having a shark off.

The Race Is On

Hello lads & lassies! 

It's unfortunate I didn't have my camera on hand during last weekend's Knoxville Covenant Health Marathon (half marathon for me). You know magnificent photo ops abound anywhere you find thousands of folks in tight clothes. For instance, I'm looking around while bending down stretching at the starting line and see this vast forest of ankles and new kicks. I was literally standing in a $600,000 sea of tennies...now that's a bunch of sparkly mesh and rubber! "Staying Alive" would've been the perfect theme song for this concrete disco ballroom of tiny reflective lights bouncing from one shoe to the next. A still photo, cool as it might be, would never do this scene justice. And of course the accompanying mixture of traffic sounds, laughter and thousands of chattering voices added an exhilaration factor no photograph could produce. 

Ok, moving on. People ask me if I ran with an mp3 player...wouldn't that make the time go by faster etc?  Well yes and no. I do love music, but then I'd miss all the fun chit-chat swirling about. People hearing is no less entertaining than people watching. Talk of injured body parts, pronation, inflammation, syndromes, weight gain, weight loss, carb loading, power gel shots (gross or delish?), their dog's awesomeness, how much cake they're gonna eat, and BEER...lots and lots of beer. The undulating (and often cracking) vocal pitches produced by pavement pounding was def an added bonus. And you can't forget the wedding singer-esque cover bands at random mile markers. Oh man, the guy singing around mile six (not sure) full-on destroyed Tommy Tutone's 867-5309/Jenny. 

As for me and my performance - sorta slow, but happy. My last half marathon was in 2008 and I was SO not ready for this one. A slight foot injury and other random lower body pains kept me from properly training (and perhaps a touch of laziness). I happily hobbled through the last few miles on nerves and adrenaline then booked the last half mile...the best part! Billy Joel says, "don't forget your second wind" and I didn't (thanks Billy). The finish line was located on the Neyland Stadium football field and your name's announced over the loud speaker upon arrival. A nice perk for me since I've never attended a single UT football game in all my 34 years. At least I got a little slice of UT football fun (enough to tie me over for the next twenty years). Oh, and I LOVED seeing my family wave from the stands..♥.. Can there be two best parts?

Hills Is Where The Toys Are!

My parent's had a garage sale last year 

and I unearthed these old treasures. 

Can you tell we grew up in the 80's? (with the exception of Ren)

HA! This furry bowling pin with a face was my sister's poor 

excuse for an ET doll. Yeah, he's pretty messed up.

Def gonna need some digits before phoning home. 

Last but not least...

My favorite toy as a wee lass, the Fisher Price trucker with his trusty steed.

 My dad & grandmother took me to Hills ("Where The Toys Are", or were) to 

pick out any toy in the store and I ended up with these guys. I thought wow, 

this toy is in superb shape considering how rough I played with it. Even the

 fishing wire I used to drag it around was still tied to the front bumper. 

Knoxville people - Do you remember Hills department store in Fountain City? 

Geez that was forever ago. I witnessed some disturbing things in that

 place...but that's for another day.

Chintzy Hoots

Bought some hooters at Target today - a dollar each, what a steal! 

Guilty lookin' little fellas.

Jusk Call

The moment I finally snap a pic of this sign a lady from "Friends Of Literacy" begins speaking on the radio....."We're always looking for volunteers".

Ok, I get it.