The Waitress's Speech

I was riding my bike down town when I decided to stop and snoop around the internally demolished Macleod's Irish Pub (or used to be). This classy karaoke hot-spot just happened to be my place of employment a little over a decade ago. One of the gazillion restaurants/pub jobs I held during my roaring twenties.

So I go inside, start shuffling around and memories are surfacing. Mostly of a few folks I worked with, two ladies in particular. First, this early forty something hyper-granola girl, not the typical jam band following trustafarian type but closer to the fruit loop type. During break time she'd speak of various activism efforts gone awry and her favorite hippy hobbies consisting mainly of grass smoking, acid dropping, and physically rolling in flower beds (well, guess we had a few things in common). But this girl would tie herself to T-Dot trucks, wander parking lots slapping earth-first stickers on Escalades and camp in trees three days on end. Unfortunately, her efforts landed her in jail, roads were still expanded and trees were still hacked. Gotta give her an "A" for effort at least. The thing I found highly peculiar was how she nonchalantly giggled about these fizzled fiascos as if the causes she so boldly fought for, in reality, held no importance to her whatsoever. 

The next girl coming to mind trained me my first week. Boy was she ever mean! She bitterly bossed the heck out of people and wore her seniority like a neon sign, flicking it on every time we needed something. But here's the kicker, she stuttered....horribly. I watched "The King's Speech" the other night and consistently thought of her throughout the movie. And listen folks, I'd never make light of someone's physical uncontrollables, that's ALL KINDS of wrong. But I won't lie, the idea was definitely entertained. My darker side wanted full on no-holds-barred retaliation! That's right, I wanted her to feel as horrid as I felt in the wake of her extreme bitchiness. And with my twenty two year old piss-poor attitude and unbridled tongue, it's surprising I kept my cool. Looking back, I'm glad I did. Who knows what she'd been through, probably some messed up stuff. You know, it sorta feels bad thinking about it now, wish I'd been kinder. Oh well, you live and you learn right? And I can't beat myself up too much. As time passed, we did actually become friendlier with one another and her stammer lessened (around me at least).....that movie was fabulous by the way.

Welcome to Macleod's! Smoking, non, or landfill section?

      This drink station appears to be out of order.

Bring on the drunk frat daddies!!